Let’s get negative.

What are the first three things you think of that are not going well in your life right now?

Next, how are you complicit in those negative outcomes?

This is a question I heard recently in this interview between Jerry Colonna and Tim Ferriss, and I think it is a question we should all ask more often.

It also may help me with something I’ve been working on.

I have been thinking lately about my mission statement for the work I do as a health coach. I want to articulate the change that I seek to make.

It goes deeper than helping people reach their health goals. It has something to do with helping people take control (or responsibility?) for their lives, including for their health, daily wellbeing, and energy. I like the word responsibility. We cannot control other people, but we can control our own responses. Grappling with that reality in different realms of our lives can, I think, bring about incredible transformation.

But it can be a big shift when we are so quick to blame others for our problems and our situation. And there are outside influences, so responsibility isn’t quite the right term for me to use.

Thinking about being complicit in a negative outcome at a point in our lives is a softer way to talk with ourselves than solely responsibility. It allows for outside factors to play a role, but doesn’t let us off the hook because we are still a part of our lives and our actions and reactions shape the ultimate outcome.

I’m still working on articulating my mission, but this is one step closer. Any ideas you have are welcome, and for now, I hope you will think about how you are complicit in at least one area of your life that you wish were different right now.